Real Teens Speak Out

Don’t Bully, Be A Friend

Pete Scampavia, a young man with multiple disabilities, completed this bullying prevention video "DON’T BULLY, BE A FRIEND" as his Eagle Scout project. Pete wanted the message to be from kids to kids because "Sometimes we just don’t want to listen when adults go on and on about something."
 
This video is near and dear to Pete’s heart. "I did my Bullying Prevention project because I was tired of my friends getting bullied. So I decided do a video on how to stop bullying".The message of the video is to ask you, the bystander, to act when you see someone being bullied. In other words, the bystander has a choice to make: Don’t bully, be a friend. Pete’s friends, fellow scouts, and volunteers from the Arc of Northern Virginia stepped in as actors in this video, with professional assistance from the Arlington Media Center of Arlington Public Schools.

In Memory of Brad

Kody has brought awareness to bullying by collecting signatures at local businesses, making posters and t-shirts, handing out PACER bookmarks, and notifying courts and schools about bullying. Kody has done all this in memory of his best friend, Brad, who after being bullied for years, died at the age of 13 from completion of suicide.

Peer Advocacy

During the 2009-10 school year, 15 seventh graders from Watertown Mayer Middle School addressed the issue of bullying head on. This "peer advocate" group, which included students in special education, collaborated to speak out about bullying, raise awareness of the issue, and make a difference in their school. The students received training from PACER Center on the issue, and were given tips about what to do if they saw another student in a bullying situation. "Bullying is an issue that affects so many students," said Julie Hertzog, PACER’s Bullying Prevention Project Director who assisted the group. "But when kids who see the bullying-the bystanders-step in, they can make a significant difference in reducing bullying."

In a survey of the peer advocates, all recommended that other schools adopt peer advocacy programs.  "This experience has open my eyes and changed the way I think about people," one student said.

Help Students Who Bully

Sabrina, a 12-year-old, has experienced both sides of the bullying issue. When she was nine, she was bullied relentlessly because of her speech impediment. By the time she was 11, she was bullying others. School staff took her aside and told her that she was physically hurting other students.  

"I denied it all, but the school officer convinced me that I really was bullying kids. She told me that if it didn’t stop, I would be arrested or kicked out of school, and that I needed help. I was kind of shocked," Sabrina says. "The officer gave me a reality check. First I was scared that I could go to jail and then ashamed that I hurt other kids."

There were several reasons why Sabrina bullied other students. "Some kids would irritate me. They would have something of mine or they would hit me," she says.  "I didn’t want to be known as a snitch, so I tried to deal with it myself and that was not a good plan." 
   
"Sometimes I was defending myself before they could hurt me. With other kids, I don’t know why I bullied them. Sometimes they would do something, and I didn’t know it was just an accident. For the majority of the bullying, I really was mad about other things and I took it out on other people" 

Sabrina wishes someone had taken her aside sooner and helped her to understand what she was doing. Talking with her school officer made all the difference. "She told me what other kids would feel like when they were bullied and that helped,"  Sabrina says. " She told me to not think about my feelings, but to think about their feelings." 

Now Sabrina has joined the bullying prevention movement and is sharing her experiences to help others. Here’s her advice for:

Students who bully
1. Think about what other people would be feeling. "I know people who bully for fun, but it’s only fun for them, not for anyone else," Sabrina says.
2. Think about what you’re doing and try to find help.

Adults
1. For kids who have been bullies, try not to judge them on what they’ve done in the past.  
2. For kids who are messing up, talk to them instead of telling them that they’re bad and sending them back to class. Help them understand why they are bullying.

Inspired By Her Sister

Jonna, a 7th grade student, is on the Teens Against Bullying Youth Leadership Board and sister to 6-year-old Amber, who was born with hydrocephalus—an excess accumulation of cerebral fluid in the brain—which has led to Amber living with very complicated medical issues and inspired Jonna to becoming an advocate, speaking out about issue that are important to her.

Jonna has been very active in bringing bullying awareness to her school in coordinating an awareness week, leading a petition signing event and speaking in front of parents and educators

Cyber vs. Physical

I have been cyberbullyed. It was AWFUL! For the first time in my life I was scared to go by a computer. I thought that was the worst time of my life. If I thought that was bad, I wonder what it’s like being physically hurt?

Adama

Bullied in middle school, Adama experienced firsthand how devastating bullying can be. Now, as a high school student, she has created a website for kids and teens to share/post their bullying stories, have resources for help and hopefully gain inspiration of how bullying made them a stronger person.

Christina!

In 6th grade, Christina participated in a year long focus group that was instrumental in designing the TeensAgainstBullying website. You might know her best as the girl on the home page, who says "this is the place".

BE STRONG – A Music Video

Hello! Me and a few friends have worked on a video to promote "Be Strong" and standing up to bullying.

"The truth is, some of us are strange sometimes, but no one deserves to be pushed around for what they like, or how they look, or what they believe in. My goal is to provide hope and strength and love to anyone and everyone who needs someone to lean on. Life is short so you’ve got to love what you’re given and never take anything for granted."

Richie’s Story

My name is Richard Meehan and I would like to share a short story about how bullying has affected our family…

I have a brother, Joshua that is 18 months younger than I am. He was picked on since he started school.  He was picked on because he was shorter then other kids, wore glasses and he could not really pronounces his R’s correctly. We are 2 grades apart in school and always rode the bus together. I didn’t really know how much he was being teased because it didn’t ever happen around me and Josh never said anything. 

This one morning when he was in 2nd and I was in 4th grade we had just gotten off the bus and was heading into theschool, for some reason, I don’t remember why Josh was close to me when we were walking, this rock came from in front of us and I was able to push Josh away from it. The rock hit me in the chest, if it would have hit my brother it would have got him right in his face.  I was winded and didn’t even know what happened until after the fact.

Come to find out Joshua was being bullied on the bus and during recess since he was in kindergarten. It started with words then by the time he was in 2nd grade it had progressed to being physical. Having me stick up for him was not the best thing for him either because kids only harassed him more about having his brother fight his battles. 

My mom started driving us to school and  spoke many times to the school about having Josh not attend recess because that is where it was the worst. The school did nothing about it. My mom got a call from school once that Josh had been in a fight and had  broke his new glasses, my mom took him to the hospital and he had a concussion. We still don’t know the true story of what really happened that day.

I told my brother to just start sticking up for himself and to fight back. I mean it is hard to watch your brother being picked on and not to be able to be there all the time to help,  you want them to defend themselves. RIGHT!  Well I am not sure if it was right or wrong I still think it was right you can only be picked on for so long before you will crack.  Josh did start defending himself and he was good at it,  he liked to fight and took every chance he could to do so.  He started by taking on one boy, then two, he once took on five boys at the same time.  By the time he was in 3rd grade he had turned into the bullier. He was even suspended for a day but he didn’t care because he at least had people noticing him and it wasn’t because he was the small kid it was because he beat up the big kid.

My mom thinks that being the bully is one of the worst things that came from this my little brother went from this cute little cuddly kid that would not even hurt an ant to being filled with hatred. Our play fights went from play to the real thing he didn’t know how to play that way anymore he couldn’t control himself, we had to stop that and we us to love rolling around on the floor together. 

My mother started homeschooling us she said because she wasn’thappy with the school but since she has said that she was afraid that Josh might hurt someone. 

It has been four years since we were in public school and my brother still has a really aggressive side to kids around his age and older which my mom attributes to the treatment he received in school from his tormentors.  He is great with little kids and adults, I think it is strange but I think it is because he doesn’t feel threatened by them. My brother will be home-schooled through 8th grade and will go to high-school in a different town than where this all happened. I don’t really know how Josh will do at the high-school because he doesn’t take crap from anyone anymore. 

I really don’t worry about him taken care of himself to much anymore because he could kick my butt.

Josh never really had any friends when he was younger because he was always made fun of.  He doesn’t really have any friends know because he is so mean and everyone is scared of him. Of course no one remembers what happened to make him be so tough except his family. 

You see there are two sides to this bulling thing and you never know what might happen.  My brother choose to fight back but some may not have that in them and  decide to give up.  I can see how bulling hurts all involved obviously the one being bullied but also the bullier, once you start you don’t want it to be the way it was before.

Unless you are the one being bullied you don’t really know who is doing what to whom as long as its not you who really cares… RIGHT…  well that needs to change everyone should care. Unfortunately we are human and it is in our nature to be this way always trying to be better then someone else.  

I wish I could say it would be different but there is always going to be hatred in the world.  I can say that I will not ever be a bully, I will not stand for anyone being bullied around me either.