Alone

I have selective mutism and I’m also on the autism spectrum so I find it hard to talk to people. I’ve never had many friends either. In my primary school I was teased a bit but I had friends. In my first secondary school I was put in a special needs unit with people older than me who I didn’t know. I hated it there and I was eventually pulled out of that school and home schooled. After about a year I decided to go to a different school. This school was huge with about 900 other students. I made friends with one girl but she frequently left me out and went off to talk to other people. I was called names everyday and laughed at. They called me Anne Frank and Maddie no friends everyday. I didn’t tell anyone but I really regret that now. I endured the bullying for years until I had finally had enough and refused to go anymore. I now have barely left the house for years and when I do I feel like everyone is staring at me and I feel like I can’t breathe. I’m now under pressure to go back to school or to try college but I’m really scared that the bullying will start again. I have no friends, nobody to talk to and I have no idea what to do now.